Toxic Relationships

Your doctor. Your  neighbor. Your high school friend.  Your previous roommate.  Your hairdresser.  Hopefully NOT your spouse or partner. Hopefully NOT your family members.

We all have a few toxic relationships in our lives.  Those people we cannot let go, despite the negative energy that surrounds us when together, the chase to freshen the air. And when does the relationship change from fruitful or comfortable to toxic? Sometimes we can pinpoint one specific event, sometimes it is a path we journey on together.

Why do we maintain these relationships?  Why not sever them?  Maybe it is because it’s easier to just say YES than explain why NO should be the new answer.  Maybe it is because of the history of two players—or three-or four—who we think know more of our history than others do.  Maybe it is because we think we can move backwards, before the toxicity moved in between us, if we work hard enough.   Maybe we HOPE that by working hard enough, we can remove the toxicity, re-create the past.

It might be a combination of any of the above, changing by the person in question.

This question has been in my mind for a couple of years now, on and off.  And I still do not have an answer.  Any suggestions, my readers?  And suddenly I wonder if I might be the cause of any toxic relationships, of which I am unaware.  I certainly hope not.

P.S.  In case you wonder, I doubt any of my readers are in danger of falling  into the toxic category.

and an after thought on 5/22/12–I am thinking that some relationships simply “run the course”  and are fading, but not yet disappeared.


2 thoughts on “Toxic Relationships

  1. Maman Main

    Well, I wish these were my issues – the ones I’ve always worried about. But they are real, avoidable (as my daughter’s disease is not). Talk to your kids, help them assess others’ behaviors, which clearly you do. I’m not into maintenance of toxic relationships – if those people aren’t caring of me, what do they do to their kids, or mine? Let them go. And move on to something better.

  2. haveanopinion

    Liza, agree with your comment. Yes, these relationships are avoidable…sometimes it’s just hard to break free of them.

    And yes, I am sure that you wish your daughter’s illness was avoidable, but sadly you and your family have to deal with it on a daily basis. I hope that you are all coping now. And surrounding yourself with loving, giving, spiritually strong people to lift you up. I think of you often, wish we were closer physically.

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